Saturday, 8 May 2021

If you find the sense of time you will rise from your oblivion

Zitti E Buoni

I always quite liked the Italian entries when I was a kid. Not as much as ronenj53, of course. "She is so sensual, the way she walks, the lovely way she presents the song" he says about 1985's classic, "and the combination between them is great- they give us the impression that the song was born, for both of them". 

Yep, it's that heartwarming story of a beautiful romance between a 56 year old provincial bank manager and a 22 year old counter assistant. Magic oh magic indeed.

They bob along for ages doing stuff like this (including a song that did more to push the cause of Brexit than Dom Cummings ever did) until the first week of May 1997. It was quite a week. Labour swept to power after 18 years on the Thursday, I DJ'd a disco at the Swindon campus of the University of the West of England on the Friday and then our "own" (ie America's) Katrina Leskanich swept us to victory on the Saturday by shining a light to light the way (with a song - fact fans - that Childline had rejected for being too "happy").

So disgusted by this win (and the lamentable competition) were Italy that they gathered up their toys and threw them out of their pram for the best part of fifteen years, and ever since they've been back they appeared to have disappeared up their own parte inferiore.

You'd have thought that Italy's stagnating economy, corruption, organised crime, rampant misogyny, and shocking youth unemployment ought to make them think twice, but instead every year they take one look at the Eurovision audience and think "you need to be told".

In 2017 we got a song about the “superficial lifestyle of westerners based on materialism and appearance” sung by a man next to a dancing gorilla, in 2018 we got a pretentious song about war (“It is not a ballad, it would have burdened the atmosphere too much. What did ancient men do to overcome fears? They danced. This is a dance against fear" and then in 2019 we were treated to this tuneless dirge whose purpose was to “make people understand that, after having been children, a critical sense develops in us towards life and the way we see things" but actually just made me realise that the bowl of poppables was empty.

This year they're at it again - MÃ¥neskin is a proper rock band whose song has some psychedelia crossover. Apparently “Zitti e buoni” (Shut Up And Be Quiet) is a “manifesto for those who want to move forward by treasuring their uniqueness” but it just sounds like noise to me. 

At least Emma Marrone had some parking sass.