Tuesday, 1 May 2018

Something tells me we can make some music

My Lucky Day

And so to Moldova, a tiny, landlocked republic wedged between Romania to its west and Ukraine to its north. It may be the poorest country in the contest, but they don't worry about that in Chinasu, not with Doinita Gherman to cheer them up. So small is the process in Moldova that if you can be arsed to actually write a song and pay the entry fee, you're guaranteed a slot in the National Final, and "Drunk Mum at a Moldovan Wedding" Doinita has been very arsed for several years now.

There was the incredible "Hai Explodeaza" (Hey, Explode) in 2010, the astonishing "Life" in 2011, the remarkable "Welcome to Moldova" in 2012, the exhausting "Our planet is a paradise" in 2013, live action roleplay favourite "Energy" in 2014, a cabaret night in your crap hotel number "Heartburn" (Quite) from 2015 her amazing entry "Irresistible" from 2016 and the extraordinary "Hora pe toloac─â" ("mount him on the altar") from last year.
Surely this was her year? It had it all- Moldovan trumpets, Moldovan strumpets, strip joint dance routines and a bronzed man hiding in bacofoil popping out cooked- but yet again the Moldovan public overlooked (not so) young Doinita. Sadly she appeared to split her vote with this Pete Waterman lookalikey and DoReDos snuck through with a sort of low rent version of last year's "Hey Mama" only without Epic Sax Guy.

There's not a lot to it apart from the trumpets and the now familiar Moldovan rhythms, but given it runs at more than 30 bpm it stands out like a dog in a hospital- and like a clinically evident disease resulting from the presence of pathogenic microbial agents including pathogenic viruses, pathogenic bacteria, fungi, protozoa, multicellular parasites, and aberrant proteins known as prions; it's infectious.